two years

I don't know how it happened, but it's happened. Somehow we passed Steve's anniversary at work already. Which means we've been out here on the eastern shore for TWO YEARS. Seriously, already?

Last night we talked a lot about how far we've come in the past two years and where we're going from here. I've actually had a lot of thoughts swimming around in my head about this subject for the past few days, so I thought while it's naptime, I'd let them spill out. Sorry it's kind of random and hard to follow.

First and probably the most important thing I've learned:

When we were getting ready to pack up and leave, we had a lot of people tell us to give ourselves a year to adjust. They told us to not rush it-it would take time to get used to a new culture, neighborhood, ward, etc. I really appreciated that advice and was mentally preparing for it. Then one day one of my neighbors from my parent's ward who I admire and respect shared with us his opinion that one year is not enough. "Give it three," he said. Three years? Really? I couldn't imagine it taking THAT LONG to adjust to a new life. But now that we've been here for two, I can see what he means. You really do adjust a lot in the first year, but not completely. I can't believe how much more settled I feel after two years--SO much more than I did after just one. I'm used to changing really quickly. Life has gone a semester at a time for so long, that a year seems like it should be more than sufficient.You can do anything for a year, right? But it's a whole new feeling when you're all of a sudden somewhere "permanently," or at least for as long as it's right to be there. You're not living a year at a time anymore, because you're not leaving anytime soon. And suddenly when you're in that mindset, it takes time to really build friendships, to truly know the area (more than just grocery stores), and get into a groove that's completely different from what you're used to doing. You're changing yourself to belong in your new home. And it takes time. Anyway, I can tell by how far we've come each year so far that his statement is pretty accurate, at least for us. So to our friends who have just moved far away from home for the first time (there's a lot of you!)--give it three years. Give it time.

Second, I've learned that we're a lot happier when we focus on what we do have, rather than on what we don't. (Um, duh?) We REALLY miss the mountains. But we have endless beaches. (That acceptance is taking longer for Steve than it is for me. :)) We don't have the convenience of living in a densely populated area with everything we need within a five minute drive. But we see beautiful scenery every day on our drives and we have a lot of time in the car to talk and think. We don't have very much help and support with our callings. But we're getting opportunities to serve and participate in our ward that we'd never get in a Utah ward. We don't have any family remotely close to us. But our ward members are truly becoming our family-who we hang out with on weekends and celebrate with on holidays. We don't have a lot of friends who are members of the church. But we get to share our testimonies with others through word and example and we get to spend a lot of time with the missionaries. We hardly have anyone around who is our age and in our same stage of life. But we're adults and we're treated like adults and age really doesn't matter anymore. We don't really have a ton of people to rely on. But we're learning to be independent, and the people who we do rely on are friends we'll have for life. There's a lot of opposition around from people whose lifestyles are really different from our own. But we're relying on the Savior, strengthening our testimonies, and learning WHY we believe what we believe. And we're okay with being different.

The list goes on and on, but those are the major things that we've learned. We've grown to love where we live not because it's "awesome" or an adventure, but because we've had to work. We've had to struggle and sacrifice, but we've been rewarded so greatly for those sacrifices. We know we're where we're supposed to be, doing what we're supposed to be doing. We're grateful for the difficulties we've had and we can see the Lord's hand in our lives. It's hard to believe that we've lived out here for more of our marriage than when we were in Utah. I have to remind myself as well that Jaden is not a Utah baby--this is his home. I guess we may as well make it our home, too, and decide that it's okay to fall completely in love with where we live. So bring on year three!